What Is Emotional Development in Early Childhood: What the Research Says

Emotional development is one of the
most important and most fascinating
dimensions of early childhood — and
one that research has increasingly
recognized as foundational for academic
success, mental health, social competence,
and long-term wellbeing. Understanding
what emotional development actually
is — what it involves, how it unfolds,
what supports it, and what parents
can specifically do — is practically
important for every parent of a young child.

This article covers what the research
shows about emotional development
in early childhood — what it is,
why it matters, how it develops,
and what parents can specifically do.

What Emotional Development Is

Research on emotional development —
including foundational work by Carroll
Izard at the University of Delaware
and more recently by Ross Thompson
at the University of California Davis —
defines emotional development as the
process through which children develop:

Emotional awareness — the
capacity to recognize and understand
their own emotional states —
what they are feeling and why.

Emotional expression — the
capacity to express emotions
in socially appropriate ways —
communicating feelings effectively
without overwhelming others
or suppressing genuine experience.

Emotional regulation — the
capacity to manage emotional
responses — to tolerate frustration,
calm distress, and maintain
emotional equilibrium in challenging situations.

Emotional understanding —
the capacity to understand
others’ emotions — to recognize
what others are feeling, why
they are feeling it, and how
to respond appropriately.

Empathy — the capacity to
share and respond to others’
emotional experiences — to
feel with others rather than
only understanding their feelings intellectually.

Research finding: emotional
development is not a single
capacity — it is a complex,
multidimensional process that
unfolds across all of childhood —
and that requires both maturation
and experience to develop fully.

Why Emotional Development
Matters in Early Childhood

Research on emotional development
and outcomes identifies several specific
reasons why emotional development
in early childhood is genuinely important:

Emotional development predicts
academic success. Research consistently
finds that children with stronger
emotional development — particularly
stronger emotional regulation —
show significantly better academic
outcomes throughout schooling.
The capacity to manage frustration,
sustain attention, and recover
from setbacks — all products
of emotional development —
are essential for academic learning.

Emotional development predicts
social competence. Research
finds that children with stronger
emotional development show significantly
better social competence — because
emotional awareness, emotional
expression, and empathy are
the foundations of genuine social interaction.

Emotional development predicts
mental health. Research finds
that children with stronger
emotional regulation show significantly
lower rates of anxiety, depression,
and behavioral difficulties —
because emotional regulation
is one of the most important
protective factors for mental health.

Early emotional development
has lasting effects. Research
on early experience and development
finds that the emotional development
foundations established in
early childhood — particularly
emotional regulation and empathy —
have lasting effects on mental
health, social competence, and
relationship quality throughout life.

How Emotional Development
Unfolds in Early Childhood

Research on emotional development
identifies several key processes:

Basic emotions emerge first.
Research by Paul Ekman and
Carroll Izard finds that basic
emotions — happiness, sadness,
anger, fear, disgust, and surprise —
are present from birth or emerge
very early in infancy — reflecting
their biological basis.

Self-conscious emotions develop later.
Research finds that self-conscious
emotions — pride, shame, guilt,
embarrassment — emerge between
approximately eighteen months
and three years — because they
require self-awareness and an
understanding of social standards.

Emotional understanding develops
gradually. Research finds that
children’s understanding of
emotions — their own and others’ —
develops progressively through
early childhood — from simple
recognition of basic emotions
in early toddlerhood to more
sophisticated understanding
of mixed emotions and emotional
causes in middle childhood.

Emotional regulation develops
through co-regulation. Research
on emotional regulation and
development finds that children
develop emotional regulation
capacity gradually — first through
co-regulation with caregivers —
and then increasingly through
self-regulation as the prefrontal
cortex matures.

Co-regulation — the caregiver’s
calm regulated presence during
the child’s emotional distress —
is the most important mechanism
through which emotional regulation capacity develops.

Emotional Milestones in Early Childhood

Research on emotional development
milestones identifies characteristic
developments at different ages:

Birth to six months:
Expression of basic emotions —
happiness, distress, interest, surprise.
Social smiling — from approximately six weeks.
Responsive to caregivers’ emotional expressions.
Soothed by caregiver comfort.

Six to twelve months:
Fear and wariness — emerging
at approximately eight months.
Social referencing — using
caregiver’s emotional expression
as a guide.
More differentiated emotional expression.
Beginning emotional regulation —
through caregiver co-regulation.

Twelve to twenty-four months:
Vocabulary for emotions begins —
“happy,” “sad,” “mad.”
Empathic responses to others’
distress — attempting to comfort upset others.
Self-conscious emotions begin —
pride, shame.
Separation anxiety — reflecting
the emotional significance of attachment relationships.

Two to three years:
Rapidly expanding emotional vocabulary.
Better understanding of emotional causes —
“I’m sad because…”
Beginning emotional regulation —
though still very limited.
Tantrums — reflecting the
mismatch between emotional
intensity and regulation capacity.
Empathy increasingly sophisticated —
responding more specifically to others’ emotional needs.

Three to five years:
Understanding of mixed emotions begins.
Better understanding of how
emotions can be managed.
More sophisticated empathy —
understanding that others may
feel differently than oneself.
Theory of mind — understanding
that others have different
thoughts and feelings — enabling
more sophisticated emotional understanding.
Better — though still developing — emotional regulation.

What Supports Emotional Development
in Early Childhood

Research on emotional development
and what supports it identifies:

Secure attachment — the foundation.
Research consistently finds
that secure attachment — built
through consistent warm responsive
caregiving — is the most important
foundation for emotional development.
The securely attached child
has a safe base from which
to explore emotions — and
a reliable co-regulator available
when emotional distress is overwhelming.

Emotion coaching. Research
by John Gottman at the University
of Washington — one of the
most extensively studied parenting
approaches — finds that emotion
coaching — acknowledging and
validating children’s emotional
experiences, helping them name
and understand their emotions —
is the most effective parenting
approach for supporting emotional development.

The five steps of emotion coaching:
Notice the emotion — even subtle ones.
See the emotion as an opportunity for connection.
Listen empathically and validate the feeling.
Help the child verbally label the emotion.
Set limits on behavior while validating the emotion.

Emotional vocabulary building.
Research finds that children
with larger emotional vocabularies —
who can name and describe their
emotions specifically — show
significantly better emotional
regulation. Naming an emotion
activates the prefrontal cortex
and moderates the limbic response —
literally calming the brain.

Warm responsive co-regulation.
Research finds that the caregiver’s
calm regulated presence during
the child’s emotional distress —
responding with warmth rather
than alarm or dismissal — is
the most important mechanism
through which emotional regulation capacity develops.

Modeling emotional regulation.
Research finds that children
learn emotional regulation significantly
through observing their caregivers
manage their own emotions.
Parents who manage their own
emotions effectively — and
who narrate this management —
model the regulation that children are developing.

What Hinders Emotional Development

Research on emotional development
and its obstacles identifies:

Emotional dismissal. Research
finds that parenting that dismisses
or minimizes children’s emotions —
“don’t cry,” “you’re fine,”
“stop being so sensitive” —
significantly impairs emotional
development — particularly emotional
regulation and emotional understanding.

Emotional overwhelm. Research
finds that parenting that amplifies
emotional distress — responding
to the child’s emotions with
alarm, anger, or significant
distress of the parent’s own —
also impairs emotional development —
because it overwhelms rather
than co-regulates the child’s emotional experience.

Insecure attachment. Research
finds that insecure attachment —
produced by inconsistent, unresponsive,
or frightening caregiving —
significantly impairs emotional
development — particularly emotional regulation and empathy.

Try This This Week

Practice 1 — The Emotion Coaching Practice
What it is: A deliberate daily
practice of emotion coaching —
the most effective parenting
approach for supporting emotional development.

How to do it: This week — when
your child experiences any significant emotion —
practice all five steps of emotion coaching:

Notice: “I can see you’re
feeling something strong right now.”
Connect: Move toward — not away.
Validate: “That makes complete sense.”
Name: “That sounds like frustration —
or maybe disappointment?”
Guide: “What could help with that feeling?”

Why it works: Research by
Gottman consistently finds that
emotion coaching — practiced
consistently — produces significantly
better emotional regulation,
social competence, academic
outcomes, and mental health
than parenting that dismisses
or overwhelms children’s emotions.

Practice 2 — The Emotional Vocabulary Building Practice
What it is: A deliberate daily
practice of expanding your child’s
emotional vocabulary — building
the language that emotional regulation requires.

How to do it: This week — throughout
the day — name emotions specifically and richly:

Go beyond happy and sad —
use frustrated, disappointed,
excited, nervous, proud, embarrassed, confused.
Name emotions in yourself —
“I’m feeling a little overwhelmed right now.”
Name emotions in books and stories.
Name emotions in others you observe together.

Aim for five specific emotion
namings per day.

Why it works: Research on
emotional vocabulary and regulation
consistently finds that children
with larger emotional vocabularies —
developed through consistent
emotion naming — show significantly
better emotional regulation —
because naming an emotion activates
the prefrontal cortex and begins
to moderate the limbic response.

Practice 3 — The Emotional Regulation Modeling Practice
What it is: A deliberate daily
practice of narrating your own
emotional regulation — modeling
the capacity you want your child to develop.

How to do it: This week — when
you notice your own emotional
response — narrate it briefly and genuinely:

“I’m feeling frustrated right
now — I’m going to take a
breath and then we can figure this out.”
“I notice I’m getting a bit
overwhelmed — I need a moment to collect myself.”
“I was angry earlier — I
took a walk and now I feel
much calmer.”

Why it works: Research on
modeling and emotional development
consistently finds that children
learn emotional regulation significantly
through observing their caregivers
manage their own emotions —
making parental modeling one
of the most powerful emotional
development tools available.

The Bottom Line

Emotional development in early
childhood — encompassing emotional
awareness, expression, regulation,
understanding, and empathy —
is one of the most important
developmental investments parents
can make. Research is clear:
secure attachment is the foundation;
emotion coaching is the most
effective parenting approach;
emotional vocabulary building
significantly supports regulation;
warm co-regulation during distress
is the mechanism through which
regulation develops; and parental
modeling of emotional regulation
is one of the most powerful
tools available.

Sources

Gottman, J. M., & DeClaire, J.
(1997). Raising an Emotionally
Intelligent Child. Simon & Schuster.

Thompson, R. A. (2006).
The development of the person.
In W. Damon & R. M. Lerner (Eds.),
Handbook of Child Psychology. Wiley.

Izard, C. E. (2009).
Emotion theory and research.
Annual Review of Psychology,
60, 1–25.

Shonkoff, J. P., & Phillips, D. A. (2000).
From Neurons to Neighborhoods.
National Academy Press.